im pretty sure most swedes over the age of 13 have seen this show
I’m so proud to be an f(x) stan and more importantly I’m so proud of my girls
So it’s 3AM and It’s just occurred to me that the most telling scene in the entire Harry Potter franchise is the scene following the announcement of the participants of the Triwizard tournament.
When Harry’s name is pulled out of the cup, literally one of the first things he is asked is “did you ask an older boy to put your name in the cup for you?" or something to that effect, insinuating that, that was something nobody prepared for and that it was something that totally would have worked if anyone had been smart enough to figure it out.
However, in an earlier scene a student is turned into a hundred year old man when they try to artificially age themselves with a potion and put their name into the cup. Meaning someone trying to dangerously age themselves with potion they aren’t familiar with was something the teachers genuinely considered to be more likely than someone asking for fucking help from another student.
In other words, the wizards in Harry Potter’s world are so reliant on magic that it doesn’t occur to anyone save for people like Harry that asking for help is even an option in a given situation. This explains why wizards are so fucking ass-backwards at everything, they’re so confident that their magic is capable of doing everything for them that it has never occurred to fucking anyone that perhaps asking for help from the muggle world might be of some use.
Think about it, the wizarding world hasn’t changed in hundreds of years while in that same space of time the muggle world has figured out fucking space travel. I know it’s a cliché to say to say someone could have fucking shot Voldemort, but seriously, somebody totally fucking could have, he killed like 50 people, he was effectively a terrorist, if anyone in the wizarding world bothered to ask for help from the muggles instead of just telling them there was an invisible asshole flying around shooting death curses at everyone, they may have been able to help.
Pretty much the only reason Voldermort thinks he’s better than muggles is because he’s able to kill them with impunity using magic, something he’s only able to do so easily because muggles don’t understand what magic is. Voldemort is basically like a fucking disease, he’s an invisible, lurking entity preying on mankind from the shadows like a cowardly piece of shit. You know what else did that? Smallpox and we stomped that to death the second we understood it. That’s the difference between muggles and wizards, when muggles don’t understand something, they figure it out.
And here’s the kicker, the only reason muggles don’t understand magic at all is because the wizarding world deliberately withholds information about it. However, even if the wizarding world kept doing that, it’d only be a matter of time until a muggle figured out what magic was and how to stop or harness it because that’s what humanity does, it pushes past what we think is impossible to see what’s on the other side. We didn’t understand the sun as a species originally and now we use it to power satellites and smartphones.
The wizarding world isn’t a realm of infinite possibilities, it’s a universe of strict limitations where boundaries are never questioned. The muggle world is where the real magic happens. That’s why during the course of the Harry Potter books, which are set between 1991 and 1998, the muggle world (our world) discovered dark matter, cloned a sheep and invented fucking MP3s while the wizarding world were literally paying some dipshit to figure out what the purpose of a rubber duck was.
Wow, I really shouldn’t think about this stuff when it’s like 3AM, it gets kind of dark.
That’s not breaking Harry Potter, it’s understanding it!
(also: how did the trio defeat Voldemort? Essentially by analysing him on a technical level, what with the whole Horcrux business - “what is he made of, how does he work, how do we destroy the parts?” That’s not how wizards do things, it’s the Muggle way. So basically all of HP is a declaration of love to the modern way of life, while at the same time giving us all the entertaining stuff with the wizards and the explosions, so it’s all very impressive)
please consider: rihanna as crowley and lupita as aziraphale
this brought to you by the committee for the healthy perpetuation of good omens fancasts that don’t involve a) benedict cumberbatch and martin freeman, b) benedict cumberbatch and matt smith, c) martin freeman and matt smith, or d) all the above + arthur darvill
follow ALL the cute girls on instagram
(Disclaimer: I love Capaldi)
and then romeo-kun and juliet-chan inevitably committed the seppuku
sugoi. what light through the window comes, desu?
it is the east, and my waifu is the sun.
did my kokoro doki till now? forswear it, sight!
for i ne’er saw true kawaii till this night.
o romeo-kun, romeo-kun, doushite art thou, romeo-kun?
deny thy otou-san and refuse thy namae,
or, if thou ja nai, but be sworn my daisuki,
and i’ll no longer be a capulet-sama.
okay but hear me out:
scarlett johansson and natalie dormer playing a pair of rival assassins who fall in love and take down another assassin hired to kill them
According to the captions of the first Thor movie, the battle between the Jotuns and Asgardians take place in Norway, 965 AD. Around this time, Loki was born.
In Thor 2 the life expectancy was stated to be around 5,000. The average human life in developed countries from what I’ve gathered is approximately 82.
Therefore, in human years Loki is somewhere around 17.
#are you telling me loki is just going through his rebellious teenage emo stage
I seem to remember some interviews from 2011 where Branagh/the actors come right out and say “yeah, they may seem all grown up to us, but to Asgardian standards they’re still basically teenagers”. And it makes sense, because how else would Odin have been able to argue to Laufey that Thor was just a boy and his stupid mistakes shouldn’t be given the same weight as a grown man’s?
I love that someone did the actual math now though, ZOMG. :D
What I wanna know is how old are Thor, Sif, Fandral, Hogun and Volstagg?
^Ohohoh I’M GLAD YOU ASKED PREPARE FOR SOME LOGIC AND SHIT
We can assume Thor is roughly Loki’s age, but we know he’s the older brother. We can also assume he was young enough to not understand that Loki was adopted when Odin brought him to Asgard, so I’m going to say he’s about 18 to 21 in human terms, roughly 1058-1200 in Midgardian years.
We can also assume that Fandral, Volstagg, and Hogun are older than Thor, because in the original script (in a line which didn’t make it into the film) Volstagg mentions to Jane that it’s been about a thousand years since they were on Midgard, and asks her if she’s heard any stories about them. Therefore we can draw the conclusion that they were already mature/adult and doing cool shit in Norther Europe around the time Thor was born. Also, Volstagg has a family and children (and a sweet-ass beard), which marks him as much older than Thor. We can assume he’s in his prime, so I’ll put him down at about 2500 years old. Fandral I’ll put down as maybe twenty-five in human terms, or 1500 years old, and Hogun, who is a hard card to read (mostly because he only has three lines and nobody ever talks about him) I’ll assume is about 2000, if only because he shows signs of wanting to settle down in The Dark World (and his beard is hella bitchin)
Sif I’m going to put down as younger than the Warriors Three, mostly because Thor mentions having “proved wrong all who scoffed at the idea that a young maiden could be one of the fiercest warriors this realm has ever known” implying he grew up with her, or might even be a little older than her. She also seems to be familiar with Loki’s personality in a way the others aren’t (“he’s always been jealous of Thor”) so she may have grown up with the pair of them. I’ll put her down as a little older than Loki but younger than Thor, so about 1050-1190.
And that, my friends, has been your nightly lecture on Asgardian aging. [mic drop]
i want realistic modern fantasy like
someone finding a dragon egg and livetweeting the process of trying to hatch it (with no prior knowledge on how a dragon egg should be hatched)
a guy selling an enchanted sword on craigslist
a tattoo artist who does spell runes but for really mundane stuff like conjuring a bound demonic pen or for summoning your keys
summoning a demon for the vine
selfies with mermaids
prank calling wizards